I am full of nervous energy and excitement. I keep getting butterflies in my stomach.I suppose that's called anxiety. I get this funny little tingle and then I sort of feel it work its way up and I want to start giggling. Also, I sometimes feel as though I may spontaneously cry. Excited? Um yes. That's probably an understatement. What's more excited than excited? I'm that; whatever that is.
Manic! That's it! Usually people think of that in a negative way; like when they think of someone with bipolar disorder. They got manic and start flying on high speed. I'm kinda like that, but not doing anything too wild. I was just very efficient at work today. I had to, in part, because I wanted to start getting things ready for when I am off. The other part is that if I stopped I'd probably become way too easily distracted for about a zillion reasons. Distracting me would not take much today. So, I am happily manic in productive way. Mostly.
Also...I was talking to myself, but in a sing-song voice.
I was so happy to see that the weather forecast was nice. I need to get outside for some exercise. If my cousin goes again we will just walk but I am okay with that...At least it is something; and it is outside. I still want to do that beach run before surgery, so maybe after we walk I'll do a short run up and down the beach. Hopefully no one is watching. They may wonder why I'm coming back so soon, or I'll look like I'm just running back and forth. Oh well. At least I'm out there running, even if I look like I'm running back and forth because I don't know where to go! I'm the girl on the beach getting the exercise; not the person in their car who wouldn't even think of taking a run down the beach.
I definitely plan to run on Tuesday afternoon before I head out of town. That will be my last run for at least a couple weeks. I definitely plan to make it a good one, but I'm also going to be sure to ENJOY it. I'll probably look like a fool running around with a goofy smile on my face. That's okay. Sometimes goofy smiles are good.
So here's my plan (and by the way AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH it's almost hereeeee!!!)...
Monday: Work...all day. That will be fun and I'm sure my focus will be worse than today. Oh boy! Home to do at least a BR and clean; hopefully start packing.
Tuesday: Work about a half day. Then I'm going home to back, headed up to my parents, doing a run, then getting ready to head out of town. Mom and I (still not sure what my Dad's plan is; Mom thinks she can handle the drugged up me on her own) are staying in a hotel near where the surgery will be. We will most likely to a little shopping and have dinner
Wednesday: After what will probably be a fairly sleepless night (nerves, excitement), I will be getting up around 5:30 to get ready!! I have to be at the surgical center at 6:30; surgery is scheduled for 8 but it's a possibility he'll move my time up to 7:30. I kinda hope that happens...Less time to sit around and be anxious! Anyway, it won't take me long to get ready in the morning. I can't wear make-up or any hair products (no hair products? OH BOY!) or anything. My outfit will be a pair of comfy (read: sweat type, like an old pair of PINK) pants and a zip up hoodie. Or a button up shirt. I think a button up shirt would like pretty redonkulous with comfy pants though. OH!! Here is what I can't figure out though... They say nothing that pulls over your head. So, I guess that means braless after? Or I find a zip up bra? Where would I even find such a thing!? I'd want it to be comfy, so like a sports bra....Who knows. I suppose braless is the way to go. Amazing. I'm sure I won't care though, having been under anesthesia and slightly loopy. I should be discharged by 2, and headed home to recover.
I honestly have no idea why I am putting so much thought into my post-op outfit. Or why I'm so concerned about a bra. Last time I had surgery my focus was on the breathing tube. I suppose since I've survived a surgery, and could wear actual clothes after, I'm not focusing on something I don't know about. Maybe that's something I do when nervous.... Anyway, so breathing tube last time; bra this time.
Have I mentioned I'm super excited?