Thursday, October 9, 2014

Just Checking In!

Hey all!  I guess it's been a bit since I've been on here to post. I'm not quite sure what I've been doing...I just haven't been posting much. I guess that means it's time for another update.

I've been continuing to do Chalean Extreme with some other activity (walking, running, and hiking - less running than walking and hiking).  I recently ordered Piyo (another truly awesome BB workout program) and I'm in my third week of incorporating that into my schedule.  A typical workout day for me is whatever CLX workout is scheduled along with whatever Piyo workout is scheduled. There are some days that I may skip one or the other - generally if I skip something it's Piyo.  Like yesterday I had Piyo core and CLX extreme abs scheduled. I skipped Piyo core since I was already doing the CLX ab workout.  CLX is my primary program which is why I choose to do those workouts over Piyo.  There is a hybrid calendar for these programs but since I was about a month into CLX when I purchased Piyo, I decided to just throw it in the mix.

I have not been running much at all lately. My last run was a 5K a few weeks ago - and even that included some walking. My race partner isn't a "runner" and with me not running so much we needed our little walk breaks. But hey, at least we were out doing something (and included a decent amount of running), right? over the last few weeks I've been either hiking with friends (about once a week) and/or walking the dogs once or twice.  Now that it's cooler and it's fall maybe I'll get out and run a bit more. Then again, I hate running in the cold, so who knows! I feel like this year my perfect running temps weren't seen all that often. It was either too warm or too cold when I wanted to run.  It's funny how when I'm doing it just for exercise I act like a baby about it. But when I'm going to a race, I just get it done.  I guess the whole race atmosphere (and the fact that I've paid for it!) is something big to me.

I've had continued issues with my knee. Ever since I fell on it that day (oh and fell on it again since then - not as hard, but definitely enough to aggravate it) I've had difficulties. Luckily chiropractic adjustments keep me going pretty well.  I've noticed that it will start to ache sometimes when I try to run or walk too far, so I typically slow my pace.  My friend and I hiked about six miles the other day. Our hike included lots of steps and trails, one of which was comprised of some pretty good inclines.  I felt myself slowing toward the end because my knee really started to hurt.  After the hike I noticed that any major motion (like going up steps) made it hurt worse.  It felt like something needed to pop inside. Fortunately I had an appointment with my Chiropractor and got that adjusted right away. It's feeling better now.

This whole knee thing kind of freaks me out. Given that six miles of hiking aggravated it but a 5K did not, I'm thinking that longer distances might be out of the mix for me.  A 10K (6.2 miles) might be the max that I can tolerate.  I wonder how long this will last! I may have to stick to 5K distances and just work on my speed and endurance.  I would love to do another long race (like a half marathon) but I wonder if that's in the cards for me anymore.  I guess only time will tell.

I've been eating mostly healthy. Weekends are still my struggle. I guess it's just a fun thing to go out to eat sometimes on the weekends.... And my boyfriend and I really like to go places. That and I feel like his snack load increases over the weekend. I'm usually within my calories because we only eat one meal some days but that is not healthy either!! I've cut down on alcohol (not that I've had much anyway) and if I do have some it's when we're out for dinner.  I think we've gotten better on going out, but we still do the take out thing sometimes....Which in terms of food isn't great. Although, that does mean I don't have any beer with dinner so it's a little better than if we were at a restaurant. I do continue to workout on the weekends. Sometimes I may change my rest day around and take a weekend rest day, but typically I squeeze in at least one of my workouts.

I've been putting a lot of recipes and photos of what I'm eating on my Facebook page. I like to try new things and see what other people are eating and since the page corresponds with the blog, I have been posting quite a bit there.  I did so much cooking last week that this week I haven't done much. I'm calling it "Leftovers Week" because that's basically what's being eaten at my house.  Except for last night...Last night I wasn't all that hungry (because I snacked on some of the boyfriend's junk - ugh no willpower, I tell ya!) so I drank a Muscle Milk. I'll be cleaning out the refrigerator tonight and getting some shopping done this weekend... So by next week I should be back to cooking and posting more.  I have some new recipes on my list as well as some that I've made before.  While I'm not on a low carb diet, I'm finding that a lot of my foods seem to go that direction.  I cook a lot of low carb and paleo-friendly recipes. The paleo recipes tend to be more healthy and natural.  Low carb seems to include a lot of high sodium, processed foods, so I try to lean toward the paleo recipes more often than traditional low carb.  Again, I'm not following a specific diet - just trying to eat clean.

That brings me to the scale.  Remember how last time I posted I had dropped a few pounds? Well it's back... I've cleaned up my eating and increased my exercise and those few little pounds came back. What. The. Heck!? I've read that with new exercise programs you can see that but considering I'm ending the Push phase of CLX if it was from changing up exercise routines, it seems like I would've lost it by now. 

CLX is based a lot on ST, including really working to build muscle. I have obviously started building some muscle. My shoulders look a lot bigger - but not fat bigger, muscle bigger. My boyfriend noticed it a week or two ago and commented on it. He said I looked strong and he also happened to think it's sexy.  I know that when people do weight training they generally are working to increase muscle which means they're not aiming on weight loss.  I've read conflicting information about the concept of gaining muscle while losing weight. Sometimes I don't know if these opinions are from people who are just focused on bodybuilding or what... But here's the thing, when you have weight to loose, muscle helps to burn fat.  Combined with a calorie target to decrease pounds, it seems logical to me that someone would then lose weight. Many people who've done CLX have LOST weight. That's kinda the point. 

So here I am, building muscle, looking and feeling tighter, and gaining weight.  What I do with CLX is increase my weight as needed.... I think my view on it and the other ST work I do is different than others who may do CLX.  I WANT to build muscle. However, I do also want to lose weight...Which should be happening. But maybe because I am increasing my weights for exercises, my body is continuing to experience a change. My muscles are sore when I'm done. I suppose it's possible that with the increased weight each week and the addition of Piyo (which includes a lot of body weight exercises), my weight is effected.

So here is what I am trying to do... Ignore that dang scale.  I'm a person who has had a constant battle with the scale. I've been obsessed with it. I've allowed my mood to be dictated by the numbers on the scale.  I think that paying too much attention to the damn scale allows me to sabotage myself.  I've been weighing in about once a week (and as of today I am down a couple pounds compared to last weekend - although it has been pre-TOM and TOM time so who knows how accurate my weight truly is right now!).

I am not giving up the scale completely. I feel like it is a good measure to help keep me in check. However, I have to find a way to do that and not feel bad about myself.  My measurement day is coming up in a couple days and I'm excited to see what changes have occurred in the last month.  If I don't see changes there, I may have a mini-meltdown. With as toned as I am looking, I'd surely think that there will be a change there. I've been working hard so I really hope to see a change. Seriously... I need something positive to help measure my progress!!!  I suppose the way my body feels should be enough, right?  I do feel like some of my clothes are fitting differently, so I should look at that too. For some reason the numbers get me though... I'm still working on how not to let them bug me.  The struggle IS constant. And real, yo.

Not seeing the change on the scale is particularly frustrating when I'm working so hard. The other part is an internal battle with myself for allowing myself to gain weight.  I've seen pictures of myself recently (okay, I'm slightly obsessed with looking at them) from a few years ago, when I hit my lowest weight.  Looking at those pictures is NOT good for me.  I'm obsessing over where I was and how I'm not there now. And it is making me feel horrible. And it's probably causing me some self-sabotage. On the flip side, that's my goal...And it's good to visualize that. I now know where I want to be - and where I felt comfortable. At that time I felt I wasn't skinny enough. Guess what! I WAS. Maybe I needed to gain a crap ton of weight to realize that I had reached a point that would be healthy for me.  Okay, lesson learned, let's get back there... Universe? You listening? Body, are YOU listening? Brain? Are you on board? Okay... We're all here....We know.  Let's do this.

For now, I'm focusing on continuing to clean up my eating (that is definitely a constant STRUGGLE - caps for emphasis on how much of a struggle it can be) and working out. I'm focusing on the feeling in my body and the appearance of my body....the muscle changes, how clothing fits... That kind of thing. I'm really going to try to focus on being healthy and less on the numbers (for what feels like the millionth time).

That's about it for now!! Goal two-- consistently blog again.

Hope you're well!!

XOXO


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